The fifth week of Spring 2025 rolled in like a parade full of surprises—some teams catching beads of victory, others dodging the bitter chill of defeat. With a blizzard howling on the horizon, every roll felt like the last chance to heat things up before the storm hit. One team climbed the standings like a float in full swing, while another slipped on the icy reality of the competition. JoAnne Barber dazzled for the women with this week’s high game (158) and series (430), while Ian Estey stormed through the men’s field with a high game (233) and series (587). Now, let’s get to the matchups.

No idea why Nick is represented by a gibbon

First up, on lanes 1 & 2: In a showdown as tense as a crowded Bourbon Street alleyway, Squid Row took on FILPB. Matthew Taylor delivered a strong 556 series, but Squid Row found themselves slipping on the figurative ice, managing just one win. On the other side, Nick Kinney came alive with a 549 series, leading Eff It to a commanding 3-win performance. As the final pins fell, Eff It erupted in celebration, their spirits soaring as they solidified their spot just behind Squid Row in the standings. Squid Row may still sit in 1st place, but they can feel Eff It breathing down their necks in 2nd.

On lanes 3 & 4: The battle between Gutterly Hopeless and Bowls Deep was a true test of endurance. JoAnne Barber gave Hopeless a fighting chance with a solid 430 series, but the pins had other plans—just one win made it onto their scoreboard. Meanwhile, Ian Estey threw strikes like beads from a float, racking up a 587 series and leading Bowls Deep to 3 big wins. Their celebration was electric, knowing they had climbed a spot in the standings, proving that when they go deep, they go all the way. Gutterly Hopeless stays stranded in 4th, while Bowls Deep surges to 5th.

Finally, down on lanes 5 & 6: In a matchup that felt as unpredictable as the storm brewing outside, FFK battled . Dustin Schmeltz put up a solid 528 series, but FFK’s game crumbled like a king cake without the prize inside—just one win and a painful drop in the standings. Meanwhile, AJ Hofmann's 566 series was impressive, but the true showstopper was trifecta-winner Tim Deddens, who claimed the titles of #1 Power-Ranked, #1 Head-to-Head, and Most Valuable Bowler. With him at the helm, Team Name Loading claimed 3 dominant wins and reveled in their success, their energy crackling like a Mardi Gras night before Fat Tuesday. FFK, meanwhile, felt the weight of their losses settle in like the coming snow, dropping to 6th place as Team Name Loading held firm in 3rd.

With Week 5 in the books, the competition is as fierce as ever. But with the blizzard closing in, who will stay hot, and who will be left frozen in place?

Bowlers who skipped the Mardis Gras parade to hang out at The 200 Club instead include: AJ Hofmann (206,203), Ben Spencer (220), Dennis Walling (200), Dustin Schmeltz (200), Ian Estey (233), Matthew Taylor (211), and Nick Kinney (222)

In this week's Tournament of Champions brackets: Ian Estey cleaned up Division 1, while nobody claimed victory in Division 2 (though Ben Spencer came closest). Tim Deddens vanquished Division 3, and Brian Schaben claimed victory in Division 4. In terms of overall points: Ian Estey governs Division 1; Nathan Burrows runs the show in Division 2; Tim Deddens and Buck Nasty lead Division 3 in a tie; and Brian Schaben and Jacob Holst hold the reins in Division 4 in a tie.

NEXT WEEK:

• First, on lanes 1&2, 5th-place Bowls Deep (hcp 28) will socialize with 3rd-place . DEEEEEEP is expected to perform well and sweep the series; while Team Name Loading is forecast to drop their average a bit while they endure a rough night.
• Moving to lanes 3&4, 6th-place FFK (hcp 67) will compete against 2nd-place FILPB. Kittens might maintain their current strength as they and split the series with Eff It; while Eff It ought to hold steady as they keep the series tied.
• Finally, on lanes 5&6, 1st-place Squid Row will face 4th-place Gutterly Hopeless (hcp 140). Squid is predicted to have a bit of an off night, yet still manage to win the series; while Hopeless are anticipated to hold steady as they avoid getting swept.

^*(Remember, the predicted results above are based on mathematical extrapolations and can be changed by all sorts of factors. If you don't like how your team's results are predicted, you and your teammates have the power to prove the math wrong!)

THIS WEEK'S MVB Tim Deddens Runner Up: (See Posting)	#1 POWER BOWLER Tim Deddens Runner Up: AJ Hofmann	#1 H2H BOWLER Tim Deddens Runner Up: AJ Hofmann
FROM THE GUTTER (GUTTER QUOTE) "I've never been able to do this before!" Tim Deddens, who has known Scoot for somewhere around 15 years, humping him after his first turkey

Pos.	Team name	Record	Percent	Total Pins	Change
1	Squid Row	12-8	.600	9,979	n/a
2	FILPB	11.5-8.5	.575	9,741	n/a
3	(Team Name Loading)	11.5-8.5	.575	8,623	n/a
4	Gutterly Hopeless	9.5-10.5	.475	7,358	n/a
5	Bowls Deep	8.5-11.5	.425	7,608	+1
6	FFK	7-13	.350	8,455	-1