"This was a really good week of bowling. Ridiculously good. Huge scores. Big numbers. The biggest. Bigly." Okay, easy there Donald, it wasn't the biggest. But it was actually really close. Overall, this was the sixth hightest-rolliing week in league history. If that doesn't sound impressive, consider this: We have 522 weeks of bowling scores recorded, and out of 522 weeks, only 5 of those weeks posted higher scores across the board than we did last night.

The third week of Spring 2018 saw two teams climb in the standings, while four teams slipped. More than half of the bowlers raised their average. Three bowlers set a new personal best series, and one rolled new personal high game. Angela Bradford picked up this week's high game (224) and series (592) for the women. As for the men, Michael Mead and Nick Kinney both tied for this week's high game with a 258, and high series was earned by Michael Mead with a 686. And the Tournament of Champions divisions are now set, ready for one-on-one action to begin next week! Read on for all the rest of the details!

First up, on lanes 3 & 4: Mary Janes Last Frame faced off against PBR Me, ASAP. With top billing by #1 Head-to-Head Michael Mead and his stunning 686 series, Mary Jane collected 3 wins against PBR. On the other half of the score sheet, Jeremy Varnell showed off in PBR with his above-average 448 despite his team notching only a single win. Mary Janes Last Frame drops 1 spot in the standings to 4th place, while PBR jumps 2 spots to 6th.

On lanes 5 & 6: WITNESS!!! hung out with Sit Down, Be Humbowl. Blessed by #1 Power-Ranked Nick Kinney and his spectacular 676 series, Witness!!! celebrated a clean sweep over Humbowl. Across the ball return, Steven Anthony ruled Humbowl with his 559 despite his team getting swept. WITNESS!!! remains in 1st place, while Humbowl sinks 1 spot to 7th.

On lanes 7 & 8: Holy Sandbaggers, Batman! couldn't stop undressing with their eyes the members of HOF Sandwich. Headlined by Phil Schroeder with his splendid 624 series, the Sandbaggers split the series with the Sandwich. Simultaneously, Most Valuable Bowler Angela Bradford oversaw the Sandwich with her terrific 592 as they matched their opponent in wins. Holy Sandbaggers, Batman! drops 1 spot in the standings to 3rd place, while the Sandwich remains in 5th.

Finally, down on lanes 9 & 10: The splittier half of Splitbowl Countries matched wits with Three Strikes and a Spare. Showcasing Matthew Taylor with his 573 series, Splitbowl celebrated a clean sweep over Three Strikes. Concurrently, Monica Hufford shined in Three Strikes with her 499 despite her team getting swept. Splitbowl Countries leaps 2 spots in the standings to 2nd place, while Three Strikes sink 1 spot to 8th.

A new personal high game was set tonight by Conrad Bonney (213, previous best 205). In addition, new personal best series were rolled by Phil Schroeder (624, previous best 622), Nick Kinney (676, previous best 630), and Conrad Bonney (528, previous best 506).

Angela Bradford earned both this season's women's high game and series with her 224 and 592, respectively. In addition, Michael Mead nabbed this season's men's high game with his 258.

The 592 rolled by Angela Bradford is the new 4th-best women's series in league history!

The Tournament of Champions begins next week. Here are the final division assignments for this season:

Bowlers entering The 200 Club include: Aaron Barber (208,232), Angela Bradford (202,224), Conrad Bonney (213), Dennis Walling (208), Doug Bonney (201), Matthew Taylor (205), Michael Gordon (208), Michael Mead (225,258,203), Nick Kinney (235,258), Phil Schroeder (245,200), Scott Murdock (201), Seth Gunderson (201,200), and Steven Anthony (220)

NEXT WEEK:

• First, on lanes 3&4, 5th-place HOF Sandwich will meet with 8th-place Three Strikes and a Spare (hcp 128). The Sandwich is expected to roll a little low, yet still manage to win the series; while Three Strikes are forecast to drop their average a bit while they avoid getting swept.
• Moving to lanes 5&6, 3rd-place Holy Sandbaggers, Batman! (hcp 10) will share a couple of pitchers with 2nd-place Splitbowl Countries. The Sandbaggers might tank their averages considerably as they get swept; while Splitbowl ought to drop their average a bit even as they rack up a sweep.
• Then, over on lanes 7&8, 1st-place WITNESS!!! will chuck some balls with 4th-place Mary Janes Last Frame (hcp 3). Witness!!! will likely have their averages plummet as they lose the series but avoid getting swept; while Mary Jane will probably hold steady as they enjoy their victories.
• Finally, on lanes 9&10, 7th-place Sit Down, Be Humbowl will socialize with 6th-place PBR Me, ASAP (hcp 98). Humbowl is predicted to see a pretty significant "market correction" to their averages as they just barely lose the series; while PBR is anticipated to drop their average a bit even as they enjoy their victories.

^*(Remember, the predicted results above are based on mathematical extrapolations and can be changed by all sorts of factors. If you don't like how your team's results are predicted, you and your teammates have the power to prove the math wrong!)

THIS WEEK'S MVB Angela Bradford Runner Up: (See Posting)	#1 POWER BOWLER Nick Kinney Runner Up: Michael Mead	#1 H2H BOWLER Michael Mead Runner Up: Nick Kinney
FROM THE GUTTER (GUTTER QUOTE) "If he wants to do a side-by-side comparison, he'll have to start by unchaining Dani from his basement." James Tott, after Pat wondered aloud whether Chelsea or Dani brings him PBRs faster.