The Fall 2017 season began with two teams' worth of bowlers absent, but that didn't stop some big games from causing some surprising upsets across the lanes.
First up, on lanes 1 & 2: JG's Rusty Nuts may be in the running for the biggest beer-consuming team since Pat Searcy, but they got off to a rocky start against Gudder Chaos. Led by Jeremy Varnell and his 357 series, the Nuts managed only 1 win against Chaos. Meanwhile, led by Jake Parrott and his MVB-winning 472 series, Gudder Chaos secured 3 wins. JG's Rusty Nuts begins the in 10th place, while Gudder Chaos starts out in 4th.
Gudder Chaos was assisted this week by sub James Tott, who will be available as a floating sub until November. He has made it his goal to try to sub on every team. I promised him that if he succeeds, we will create a new badge in honor of the achievement.
On lanes 3 & 4: Less Terra Bowl snuggled up with Holy Sandbaggers, Batman!. Led by rookie and this week's #1 Power Ranked Bowler Matthew Taylor and his 636 series, Less Terra Bowl secured 3 wins against Holy Sandbaggers, Batman!. Meanwhile, led by Phil Schroeder and his 468 series, Holy Sandbaggers, Batman! could only land 1 win. Less Terra Bowl begins in 2nd place, while Holy Sandbaggers, Batman! begins in 8th. By the way these are two teams that both have a long history of being the last to finish. It's even worse when they bowl each other. And even worse still when balls get stuck. And even worse than that when there are back-to-back total eclipses of the scoreboards. And even worse than that when the scoring computer locks up multiple times. It's a miracle they weren't still bowling when you all returned for week 2.
On lanes 5 & 6: Mustache Cash Stash exchanged nervous glances with Split It & Hit It. Michael Mead took the reins with a 603 series that included a league-high 268 game (assisted by #1 Head-to-Head bowler AJ Hofman), leading Mustache Cash Stash to 3 wins against Split It & Hit It. Meanwhile, Russell Bingham and his 528 series helped Split It to their lone win. Mustache Cash Stash begins the season in 1st place, while Split It & Hit It begins in 7th.
On lanes 7 & 8: Half of Bowl Yer Ballz Off had a delightful time with Roll, Drink, Repeat. Led by Rob Kaszuba and his 442 series, Bowl Yer Ballz Off split the series with Roll, Drink, Repeat. Meanwhile, led by Sean Simmons and his 520 series, Roll, Drink, Repeat ended in a stalemate. Bowl Yer Ballz Off remains in 6th place, while Roll, Drink, Repeat remains in 5th.
Finally, down on lanes 9 & 10: The Alt-Left spent a romantic evening with NotContra. Led by Lefty John Boren and his 424 series, The Alt-Left managed only 1 win against NotContra. Meanwhile, led by Seth Gunderson and his 544 series, NotContra secured 3 wins. The Alt-Left remains in 9th place, while NotContra remains in 3rd. It should be noted that this is the first time in all 36 seasons of bowling that Ken has had the lowest average in all of the league. But this is because the Alt-Left is a team of right-handers who are all bowling left-handed this season.
Looking at their scores, it's clear John Boren quickly got the hang of it.
The Tournament of Champions begins in 3 weeks. Here are how the divisions are shaping up so far:
DIVISION 1 1. Matthew Taylor 2. Michael Mead 3. Michael Gordon 4. Seth Gunderson 5. AJ Hofmann 6. Russell Bingham 7. Sean Simmons 8. Aaron Barber 9. Dennis Blake 10. Dennis Walling | DIVISION 2 1. Sean Miller 2. Phil Schroeder 3. Scott Murdock 4. Rob Kaszuba 5. Freda Schroeder 6. Ben Spencer 7. Lefty John Boren 8. Nick Kinney 9. Dennis Laube 10. Lefty Ian Goetz | DIVISION 3 1. Jason Carpio 2. Michael Smith 3. Jeremy Varnell 4. Pat Hamell 5. Chantal Jacot 6. Alison Radke 7. Josh Rothermel 8. Lefty Carl Goetz 9. JoAnne Barber 10. Lefty Ken Wilson | DIVISION 4 1. Steven Anthony 2. Conrad Bonney |
Bowlers entering The 200 Club include: Matthew Taylor (206,246), Michael Gordon (204), Michael Mead (268), and Russell Bingham (224)
THIS WEEK'S MVB
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FROM THE GUTTER (GUTTER QUOTE)
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Pos. | Team name | Record | Percent | Total Pins | Change |
1 | Mustache Cash Stash | 3-1 | .750 | 2,170 | n/a |
2 | Less Terra Bowl | 3-1 | .750 | 1,886 | n/a |
3 | NotContra | 3-1 | .750 | 1,838 | n/a |
4 | Brooklyn Strikers | 3-1 | .750 | 1,571 | n/a |
5 | Roll, Drink, Repeat | 2-2 | .500 | 1,691 | n/a |
6 | Bowl Yer Ballz Off | 2-2 | .500 | 1,494 | n/a |
7 | Split It & Hit It | 1-3 | .250 | 1,773 | n/a |
8 | Holy Sandbaggers, Batman! | 1-3 | .250 | 1,668 | n/a |
9 | The Alt-Left | 1-3 | .250 | 1,402 | n/a |
10 | DB's Rusty Nuts | 1-3 | .250 | 1,342 | n/a |
“It should be noted that this is the first time in all 36 seasons of bowling that Ken has had the lowest average in all of the league” proving once and for all that you simply cannot teach an old dog new tricks…at least not immediately.
I like it when Ken refers to himself as a dog. FINALLY.
okay, maybe this left handed thing was a stupid idea.