The eleventh week of Spring 2008 saw three teams climb in the standings, while two teams slipped. One bowler set a new personal best series, and one rolled new personal high game. Freda Schroeder picked up this week's high game (189) and series (480) for the women, while Don Glasscock earned this week's high game (268) and series (666) for the men. Read on for all the rest of the details!
First up, on lanes 19 & 20: Dios Mios matched wits with You Don't Know Sh!t. In spite of top-billing by John Boren with his 530 series, Dios Mios got swept by Don't Know Sh!t. Across the ball return, Duncan Ferber mastered Don't Know Sh!t with his wondrous 645 as they swept the competition. Dios Mios plummet 2 spots in the standings to 6th place, while Don't Know Sh!t remains in 2nd.
On lanes 21 & 22: ? faced off against Dr. Strangelanes, Or How I Learned To Stop Opening And Earn The Belt. Despite being led by John Coleman with his (either injured, sick, or sandbagging) 441 series, ? accomplished only 1 win against Dr. Strangelanes. Meanwhile, Seth Gunderson reigned supreme in Dr. Strangelanes with his above-average 538 (with kudos to Most Valuable Bowler Shaun Crockett) as his team took the series with 3 wins. ? leaps 1 spot in the standings to 4th place, while Dr. Strangelanes move 1 spot to 5th.
On lanes 23 & 24: Sofa King Good spent a romantic evening with Ebowla. Topped by Don Glasscock with his 666 series, Sofa King collected 3 wins against Ebowla. As for the opposition, Travis Kleiner dominated Ebowla with his 466 despite his team notching only a single win. Sofa King Good remains in 7th place, while Ebowla remains in 8th.
On lanes 25 & 26: 3 Dudes and a Doll shared a platter of cheese sticks with It's Britney, Bitch. Highlighting the skills of Ryan Doll with his 516 series, 3 Dudes and a Doll collected 3 wins against Britney. On the other side, Sarah Buchanan oversaw Britney with her marvelous 409 despite her team notching only a single win. 3 Dudes and a Doll remains in 3rd place, while Britney sinks 1 spot to 10th.
Finally, down on lanes 27 & 28: Bad Newz Kennels deliberately ate cheese sticks in front of Split Happens. Regardless of the star power of Dennis Laube with his 481 series, the Kennels accomplished only 1 win against Split Happens. Simultaneously, #1 Power Ranked and #1 Head-to-Head Ryan Schooley laid down the law in Split Happens with his exceptional 553 as his team took the series with 3 wins. Bad Newz Kennels remains in 1st place, while Split Happens move 1 spot to 9th.
Bowlers paying far too much for well vodka at The 200 Club include: Cory Chorpenning (200), Don Glasscock (268,215), Duncan Ferber (201,220,224), and Ryan Schooley (204)

The 268 rolled by Don Glasscock is tied for the 6th-best game in league history!
In this week's Tournament of Champions brackets: Duncan Ferber decimated Division 1, while Travis Kleiner rolled his ass to the top of Division 2. Nobody claimed victory in Division 3 (though John Richardson came closest), and Shaun Crockett spanked Division 4. And, finally, nobody claimed victory in the Interdivisional bracket, and in fact we aren't even going to talk about this bracket as it was a complete embarassment. In terms of overall points: Kendall Kukowski dominates Division 1; Dennis Laube holds the reins in Division 2; Kris Hiestand leads Division 3; and Aubrey Moren reigns over Division 4.
NEXT WEEK:
- First, on lanes 19&20, 3rd-place 3 Dudes and a Doll will chill with 8th-place Ebowla (hcp 68). 3 Dudes and a Doll is expected to maintain their current strength as they win the series; while Ebowla is forecast to raise their average even as they avoid getting swept.
- Moving to lanes 21&22, 6th-place Dios Mios (hcp 60) will meet with 1st-place Bad Newz Kennels. Dios Mios might maintain their current strength as they get swept; while the Kennels ought to hold steady as they rack up a sweep.
- Then, over on lanes 23&24, 2nd-place You Don't Know Sh!t will test their mettle against 9th-place Split Happens (hcp 160). Don't Know Sh!t will likely have a bit of an off night and lose the series but avoid getting swept; while Split Happens will probably raise their average while they enjoy their victories.
- Next up, on lanes 25&26, 5th-place Dr. Strangelanes, Or How I Learned To Stop Opening And Earn The Belt (hcp 47) will challenge 7th-place Sofa King Good. Dr. Strangelanes might perform well and win the series; while Sofa King ought to drop their average a bit while they avoid getting swept.
- Finally, on lanes 27&28, 4th-place ? will spend some quality time with 10th-place It's Britney, Bitch (hcp 70). ? is predicted to maintain their current strength as they sweep the series; while Britney is anticipated to raise their average even as they endure a rough night.
THIS WEEK'S MVB
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FROM THE GUTTER (GUTTER QUOTE)
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Pos. | Team name | Record | Percent | Total Pins | Change |
1 | Bad Newz Kennels | 29-15 | .659 | 21,200 | n/a |
2 | You Don't Know Sh!t | 28-16 | .636 | 24,239 | n/a |
3 | 3 Dudes and a Doll | 26-18 | .591 | 20,247 | n/a |
4 | ? | 22-22 | .500 | 18,059 | +1 |
5 | Dr. Strangelanes, Or How I Learned To Stop Opening... | 21-23 | .477 | 20,377 | +1 |
6 | Dios Mios | 21-23 | .477 | 18,910 | -2 |
7 | Sofa King Good | 20-24 | .455 | 22,607 | n/a |
8 | Ebowla | 18-26 | .409 | 17,495 | n/a |
9 | Split Happens | 16-28 | .364 | 16,211 | +1 |
10 | It's Britney, Bitch | 16-28 | .364 | 15,631 | -1 |