The eleventh week of Fall 2023, the first bowling session after the time change, was just another reminder of how early it gets dark outside. It left me feeling as gloomy as the skies. I guess some teams climbed and others slipped, but who really cares when it's this dark and depressing outside?

JoAnne Barber rolled her usual high game (157) and series (398) for the woman, which is nice, I guess. For the men, Matthew Taylor snagged a high game with a 208, and Nick Kinney got the high series with a 570. Yippee.

Now, let's delve into the exciting world of bowling on these gloomy lanes, shall we?

First up, on lanes 1 & 2: DB Lenz a Hand and Glory Bowl played some bowling, but being the teams closest to the windows the darkness seeped in from outside and sombered things up. Chris Lenz and Kent Harms both led their teams with an identical 435 series -- good for Chris but slightly off for Kent. So anyway they did their thing, and it seems like DB Handlers won all the games. They climbed one spot, and the G-Holers slipped one spot to the bottom. Whoop-de-doo.

On lanes 3 & 4: Sun Dolphins and Vigs Eras Tour 2023 did their usual stuff. JC Cox (432, including a new best game so yay for him) and #1 Power Ranked and #1 Head-to-Head Nick Kinney (above average 570) played bowling well while trying to forget the despair outside. I think The Vigs Tour crew won most of the games or something. Sun Dolphins stayed put, and The Vigs Tour crew remained in first place. How fascinating.

Finally, on lanes 5 & 6: √-1 and Balderdash engaged in a match that was about as entertaining as watching my own tears fall into a puddle of misery. But it at least had the entertainment value of seeing AJ get so frustrated at all three of his teammates getting so distracted by their phones that he took them away. Imaginary Number, led by AJ Hofmann and his 443 series that was, well, not great, could only scrape together one win against Bald Boys. Then the lane broke for a long time, sending us all spinning even later into the darkness. And, as if the universe wanted to taunt me further, Dennis Walling and Matthew Taylor both achieved a collective 513 series (or maybe "collective" isn't the right word, "identical" is more like it), which somehow managed to draw the spotlight of Bald Boys as they snatched victory with three wins. √-1 remained in 3rd place, while Bald Boys continued their lackluster presence in 2nd.

And as the darkness outside grows deeper, so does my enthusiasm for this bowling league summary. I can hardly contain my joy.

Bowlers who were an hour late to at The 200 Club because of the dreary darkness and because they wouldn't stop playing on their phones include: JC Cox (206) and Matthew Taylor (208)

A new personal high game was set tonight by JC Cox (206, previous best 177).

Adding to the excitement, the 157 rolled by JoAnne Barber is this season's new high game among women.

In this week's Tournament of Champions brackets: Nick Kinney rolled his ass to the top of Division 1, while nobody claimed victory in Division 2, and in fact we aren't even going to talk about Division 2 as it was a complete embarassment. Nobody claimed victory in Division 3 (though Jeremy Varnell came closest), and Chris Lenz won Division 4. In terms of overall points: Aaron Barber dominates Division 1; Ben Spencer governs Division 2; Nicholas Knight holds the reins in Division 3; and Brian Schaben and Chris Lenz lead Division 4 in a tie.

NEXT WEEK:

• First, on lanes 1&2, 4th-place Sun Dolphins (hcp 144) will test their mettle against 2nd-place Balderdash. Dolphins are expected to roll a little low and get swept; while Bald Boys are forecast to drop their average a bit even as they rack up a sweep.
• Moving to lanes 3&4, 6th-place Glory Bowl will face 3rd-place √-1 (hcp 2). The G-Holers might roll a little low, yet still manage to win the series; while Imaginary Number ought to drop their average a bit while they avoid getting swept.
• Finally, on lanes 5&6, 5th-place DB Lenz a Hand (hcp 107) will challenge 1st-place Vigs Eras Tour 2023. DB Handlers are predicted to maintain their current strength as they lose the series but avoid getting swept; while The Vigs Tour crew is anticipated to drop their average a bit even as they enjoy their victories.

^*(Remember, the predicted results above are based on mathematical extrapolations and can be changed by all sorts of factors. If you don't like how your team's results are predicted, you and your teammates have the power to prove the math wrong!)

THIS WEEK'S MVB Chris Lenz Runner Up: (See Posting)	#1 POWER BOWLER Nick Kinney Runner Up: JC Cox	#1 H2H BOWLER Nick Kinney Runner Up: Chris Lenz
FROM THE GUTTER (GUTTER QUOTE) "I don't want that beard near any orifice." Dennis Walling, at least we think it was him, it was hard to hear under all the saddened groans that followed, denying a specific pleasure to the group of bearded men he was surrounded by.