With so much darkness and suffering in our country and the world the last 11 days, it is nothing short of miraculous when a tiny ray of light cuts through the darkness and brings hope to a world in sorrow. So, Omaha Hambone, we thank you.
First up, on lanes 1 & 2: Ebowla attempted to turn a rapidly-reinvented Suckeredintoit into Patient Zero. Sean Simmons and spearheaded the infection with a 456 series, but Suckeredintoit inoculated themselves with Brandon Darby's 375 to split the series. Ebowla drops 2 spots in the standings to 5th place, while Suckeredintoit makes their belated start in 7th. Look for this team to change again next week.
On lanes 3 & 4: FYWFK spent a terrabowl evening with Terra Bowler. Led by AJ Hofmann and his 486 series, FYWFK split the series with Terra Bowler. Meanwhile, led by Scott Murdock and his 455 series Ben Spencer and his blind 456 series, Terra Bowler managed to at least keep from losing. FYWFK remains in 6th place, while Terra Bowler moves up 1 spot to... 1st??? WTF?!?!?
On lanes 5 & 6: Trump's Toupee tried to deny entry to Holy Sandbaggers, Batman!. But (in an extrapolated parallel to the popular vote), led by Dustin Schmeltz and his 477 series, Trump's Toupee managed only 1 win against Holy Sandbaggers, Batman!. Meanwhile, led by Aubrey Moren and his 565 series, Holy Sandbaggers, Batman! secured 3 wins. Trump's Toupee drops 1 spot in the standings to 8th place, while Holy Sandbaggers, Batman! moves up 1 spot to 4th.
Finally, down on lanes 7 & 8: In a show of pure evil, the semi-defending Frankee's Uncles thought they should have swept with the multiple near-perfect games being rolled. However, they did not count on thebeacon of hope in these uncertain times in the form of Omaha Hambone. Led by Carl Goetz and his new personal-best 739 series, and assisted by Ken Wilson finally rolling his long-belated 100th 600+ series, Frankee's Uncles managed only 1 win against Omaha Hambone. Meanwhile, led by Michael Gordon and his ironically non-evil new personal-best 666 series, the Omaha Boners secured 3 wins. Frankee's Uncles drops 2 spots in the standings to 3rd place, while Omaha Hambone jumps 2 spots to 2nd. Yes, the team with Carl and Ken is 2 places behind the team with Scoot and Dennis. Booyah. [EDITOR'S NOTE: In the interest of full disclosure, the author of this piece is a member of the team accidentally propelled into first place as a result of the events of this particular matchup.]
Bowlers entering The 200 Club this week include: Aaron Barber (245,201), Aubrey Moren (202), Carl Goetz (225,259,255), Ken M. Wilson (220,223), Kody Karnes (232,218), and Michael Gordon (251,219)
See you next week!
THIS WEEK'S MVB
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FROM THE GUTTER (GUTTER QUOTE)
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Pos. | Team name | Record | Percent | Total Pins | Change |
1 | Terra Bowler | 6-2 | .750 | 3,175 | +1 |
2 | Omaha Hambone | 5-3 | .625 | 4,662 | +2 |
3 | Frankee's Uncles | 5-3 | .625 | 4,251 | -2 |
4 | Holy Sandbaggers, Batman! | 5-3 | .625 | 3,730 | +1 |
5 | Ebowla | 5-3 | .625 | 2,735 | -2 |
6 | FYWFK | 3-5 | .375 | 2,742 | n/a |
7 | Suckeredusintoit | 2-6 | .250 | 1,317 | +1 |
8 | Trump's Toupee | 1-7 | .125 | 3,084 | -1 |