Spring 2018 began tonight with a welcome to a few new bowlers, a defending champion team that is going to have to fend off multiple challengers, and several bowlers who forgot they were supposed to sandbag. Consequently, two bowlers set a new personal best series, and three rolled new personal high games. Angela Bradford picked up this week's high game (185) and series (481) for the women, while Matthew Taylor earned this week's high game (254) and series (641) for the men. Read on for all the rest of the details!

First up, on lanes 3 & 4: Defending champions WITNESS!!! tried to quickly build a wall to block those people from Splitbowl Countries, but on partially succeeded. Led by Seth Gunderson with his 584 series, and with an assist from Most Valuable Bowler Aaron Barber, Witness!!! split the series with Splitbowl. On the other side, Matthew Taylor commanded Splitbowl with his 641 as they maintained a tie. WITNESS!!! begins in 4th place, while Splitbowl begins in 3rd.

On lanes 5 & 6: HOF Sandwich alternated between bowling, drinking, and being dry humped PBR Me, ASAP. Highlighting the skills of Bob Brunker with his 532 series, the Sandwich collected 3 wins against PBR. Conversely, Jeremy Varnell guided PBR with his 421 despite his team notching only a single win. HOF Sandwich begins in 2nd place, while PBR begins in 7th.

On lanes 7 & 8: Mary Janes Last Frame did battle with Three Strikes and a Spare. Demonstrating the prowess of #1 Power-Ranked Dennis Walling and his awe-inspiring 638 series, Mary Jane enjoyed a clean sweep over Three Strikes. On the other half of the score sheet, Monica Hufford mastered Three Strikes with her 447 despite her team getting swept. Mary Janes Last Frame starts out the season in 1st place and celebrated with a little hotboxing in the parking lot, while Three Strikes is the unlucky team who gets to begin in 8th.

Finally, down on lanes 9 & 10: Holy Sandbaggers, Batman! (who were somehow the first team to finish but also get the award for messiest score sheet of the night) was challenged by Sit Down, Be Humbowl. Topped by Aubrey Moren with his 510 series, the Sandbaggers split the series with Humbowl. While that was going down, Steven Anthony oversaw Humbowl with his 538 as they maintained the tie. Holy Sandbaggers, Batman! begins in 5th place, while Humbowl starts out in 6th.

New personal high games were set tonight by Josh Rothermel (185, previous best 162), Matthew Taylor (254, previous best 247), and Conrad Bonney (205, previous best 194). In addition, new personal best series were rolled by Dennis Walling (638, previous best 603) and Conrad Bonney (506, previous best 457).

The Tournament of Champions begins in 3 weeks. Here are how the divisions are shaping up so far:

Bowlers entering The 200 Club include: Conrad Bonney (205), Dennis Walling (218,243), Jonathan Vigliaturo (200), Matthew Taylor (254), Michael Gordon (226), Michael Mead (202,211), Russell Bingham (227), Scott Murdock (204), Sean Simmons (207), Seth Gunderson (245), and Steven Anthony (205,201)

THIS WEEK'S MVB Aaron Barber Runner Up: (See Posting)	#1 POWER BOWLER Dennis Walling Runner Up: Matthew Taylor	#1 H2H BOWLER Aaron Barber Runner Up: Dennis Walling
FROM THE GUTTER (GUTTER QUOTE) "Something's wrong with this league... Scott and Jeremy both got the first turkeys of the season. Are the computers factoring weight into the scores?" AJ, voicing aloud what a few others were thinking.