Tonight's lead story should have been all about Ballz Out tripling their win record in the past two weeks. But then something happened against the far wall. But before we get to that...First up, on lanes 41 & 42: Where has Ballz Out been all season? After suffering one of the worst starts in league history, they have enjoyed back to back weeks of victories. Cliff Barendsen, rolling his ball entirely with his exposed scrotum, whipped out a 514 series to crush the opposition 3-1. Todd Way tried to defend Split It & Hit It with his 514 series, but when you have that sac waving in your face even one win is miraculous. While Ballz Out gained substantial ground, neither team moved in the standings.On lanes 43 & 44: 10 Pins 10 Balls faced off against The Pin is Mightier. Led by an unusually inconsistent Aubrey Moren and his 586 series (including a 255 game), 10 Pins 10 Balls secured a clean sweep over The Pin is Mightier. This week's Least Valuable Bowler, Scott Murdock, "led" his team to abject defeat with his pathetic 444 series. (It's likely Dan Imperial may choose not to return from Europe when he reads this post.) 10 Pins 10 Balls climbs 1 spot in the standings to 4th place, while The Pin is Mightier remains in 7th.On lanes 45 & 46: In what was the closest thing we had to an evenly-matched matchup this evening, Sponsored By Rogue faced off against Squirtin' Tunas. Led by Carl Goetz and his 654 series and assisted by a Most Valuable Bowler performance by Jonathan Vigliaturo, Sponsored By Rogue secured 3 wins against Squirtin' Tunas. Meanwhile #1 Power-Ranked bowler Aaron Barber countered with a 663 series, to reel in 1 win for the Tuna. Sponsored By Rogue remains in 3rd place, while Squirtin' Tunas drops 1 spot to 5th.Finally, down on lanes 47 & 48: Gimme Headpin faced off against Amazeballs. Led by Brian Coe and his 715 series, Gimme Headpin secured 3 wins against Amazeballs. Led by Ryan Doll and his 572 series, Amazeballs could only secure 1 win. Gimme Headpin remains in 2nd place, while Amazeballs remains in 1st.That last paragraph was the computer-generated version of the matchup text, which is what I'm going with since video is worth a thousand words to describe what else happened...

That's right, Brian Coe became the second bowler in VML League history to roll a perfect game, following in the footsteps of David Codding. Congratulations, Brian!  (Even though you managed to not get MVB, nor #1 Power Rank, nor win your division in the Tournament of Champions...   )

The 300 is not without controversy, as the league's resident pharmacist discovered performance-enhancing drugs left behind after "Gimme Headpin" departed the lanes.

This week in Tournament of Champions, Carl Goetz conquered Division 1, knocking his least-favorite begotten son out of 2nd place. Rob Kaszuba won Division 2, again, and continues to run away with it. Jonathan Vigliaturo won Division 3 to join the three-way for 2nd place, and Jake Parrott won Division 4 to knock Michael Smith out of 1st.Bowlers in The 200 Club this week include: Aaron Barber (226,227,210), Aubrey Moren (255), Brian Coe (300,213,202), Carl Goetz (246,209), Ian Goetz (212,243), Jonathan Vigliaturo (207), Kody Karnes (211,221,231), Michael Gordon (221), Ryan Doll (237), Seth Gunderson (214), and Todd Way (215)Bowlers muscling their way into The 300 Club this week include: Brian Coe (300). (Yes, now that this has a second member, it's a thing now. It's been sitting there for nearly 3 years waiting to be used!)Can those of you who still haven't paid for any of your bowling at all yet PLEASE start paying so Scoot stops getting in trouble with the front office?See you all next week!

THIS WEEK'S MVB Jonathan Vigliaturo Runner Up: (See Posting)	#1 POWER BOWLER Aaron Barber Runner Up: Brian Coe	#1 H2H BOWLER Aaron Barber Runner Up: Jonathan Vigliaturo
FROM THE GUTTER (GUTTER QUOTE) "Obviously you're not a golfer." The Dude, on Brian Coe's perfect 300 game.

Pos.	Team name	Record	Percent	Total Pins	Change
1	Amazeballs	33.5-10.5	.761	22,819	n/a
2	Gimme Headpin	27-17	.614	26,728	n/a
3	Sponsored By Rogue	25-19	.568	25,462	n/a
4	10 Pins 10 Balls	22-22	.500	23,041	+1
5	Squirtin' Tunas	20-24	.455	22,637	-1
6	Split It & Hit It	19-25	.432	17,537	n/a
7	The Pin is Mightier	16-28	.364	17,951	n/a
8	Ballz Out	10.5-33.5	.239	16,660	n/a

Men's High Series Scratch	Women's High Series Scratch
Brian Coe - 715 Aaron Barber - 663 Kody Karnes - 663 (t) Carl Goetz - 654 Ian Goetz - 641 Jonathan Vigliaturo - 589	Freda Schroeder - 483 Angela Bradford - 449 Alison Radke - 379
Men's High Series Handicap	Women's High Series Handicap
Brian Coe - 715 Aaron Barber - 694 Jonathan Vigliaturo - 670 Kody Karnes - 663 Carl Goetz - 654	Freda Schroeder - 576 Alison Radke - 542 Angela Bradford - 511
Men's High Game Scratch	Women's High Game Scratch
Brian Coe - 300 Aubrey Moren - 255 Carl Goetz - 246 Ian Goetz - 243 Ryan Doll - 237	Freda Schroeder - 171 Angela Bradford - 168 Alison Radke - 146
Men's High Game Handicap	Women's High Game Handicap
Brian Coe - 300 Aubrey Moren - 262 Todd Way - 246 Carl Goetz - 246 (t) Ian Goetz - 243 Michael Gordon - 238	Freda Schroeder - 202 Alison Radke - 200 Angela Bradford - 188
Men's Pins Over Average	Women's Pins Over Average
Brian Coe - 85 Aubrey Moren - 64 Todd Way - 54 Ian Goetz - 44 Josh Eithun - 43 Michael Gordon - 43 (t)	Alison Radke - 14 Freda Schroeder - 10

While Amazeballs extended their hold on first place considerably tonight, the bigger story was that every other matchup of the night saw the underdogs commit some amazing upsets. Getting the ho-hum matchup out of the way first, on lanes 41 & 42: 10 Pins 10 Balls faced off against Amazeballs. Continuing to thumb their noses at the rest of the league, Ryan Doll and his 597 series led Amazeballs to a clean sweep. Dennis Laube tried to mount a defense with his 560 series, but couldn't muster any wins out of it. 10 Pins 10 Balls remains in 5th place, while Amazeballs remains in 1st.

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With a good portion of the league drunk / hungover from today's Irish festivities, the rest of us enjoyed a fairly quick bowling session tonight. And in each of the matchups, the luck o' the Irish seemed to be concentrated in just one of the teams.First up, on lanes 41 & 42: Gimme Headpin faced off against The Pin is Mightier. With only a 2-man team present, it was Brian Coe's time to shine. His 681 series earned him MVB, #1 Power Ranked Bowler, and a clean sweep for his team. Meanwhile the PinIs Mightier enjoyed some DP (doubled performance) by Scott Murdock & Dan Imperial, who both led their team with a 460 series. The PinIs came up short, unfortunately. Gimme Headpin remains in 2nd place, while The Pin is Mightier drops 1 spot to 7th.

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The Spring 2015 Position Round saw almost unbearably high temperatures in the bowling alley and also saw hot action in all four matchups.UPDATE!  The mystery of the standings discrepancy has been solved.  Last week our server needed a restore from backup and this restore happened to also restore a typo that had been previously fixed.   That typo resulted in Squirtin' Tuna being credited with 1 more win than they actually had.   So yes, Seth Gunderson, it turns out they were bowling in the correct position this week.   Updates below...First up, on lanes 41 & 42: Amazeballs hoped to extend their first place lead, and with the help of Angela Bradford and her 589 series, they not only succeeded but also put themselves (just barely) beyond one-week's reach of their closest competition. The most interesting facet of this matchup, however, is that her own brother Carl Goetz rolled a 704 series (the 6th in his career) but it wasn't enough secure even a single win in a very intense battle. Sponsored By Rogue drops 2 spots to 4th place 1 spot to 3rd place, part of a three-way tie.On lanes 43 & 44: a very fishy matchup saw Squirtin' Tunas deliver such an intense onslaught that the low bowler on the team was... Aaron Barber ?!?!?. With yet another new personal best series by Michael Gordon for the second week in a row, a 643 this week, the Tuna secured three victories to climb to 2nd place but remain in 4th place due to total pins (part of a 3-way tie). Meanwhile, Aubrey Moren had to roll a new personal best game of 278 (which is also the new high score for this season) to lead 10 Pins 10 Balls to their lone win with his 641 series. 10 Pins drops 1 spot 2 spots to 5th place.On lanes 45 & 46: In the quickest matchup of the night as both teams coped with their anchors away,  Gimme Headpin finally saw signs of life with the return of as full a roster as they're going to get the rest of this season. Brian Coe's 618 series was more than enough to get a clean sweep against Split It & Hit It (led by Todd Way's 407 series). Headpin climbs 1 spot to 3rd place 3 spots to 2nd place (the total pins leader in a 3-way tie), while Split It drops a spot to 7th.

Finally, down on lanes 47 & 48: The primary goal of Ballz Out was to increase their win percentage out of the hundredths spot, and that they did. Led by Cliff Barendsen's 515 series, and assisted greatly by continental drift and the gravitational perturbations of a distant passing asteroid, they were able to secure one win and make game 3 close enough to be exciting. Sadly, for the Ballz, Scott Murdock of The Pin is Mightier remembered a few basic fundamentals after a recent slump and rolled a 532 series to lead his team to 3 wins. Ballz Out remains in 8th place but at least now has a win percentage that doesn't begin with a leading zero, while The PinIs rises 1 spot to 6th place.On a sad note, Ken M. Wilson has had to withdraw from the league for the remainder of the season. His team will be carrying his average each week, and whomever faces him in the Tournament of Champions each week needs to roll 1 pin over average to advance.This week in Tournament of Champions, Carl Goetz gained ground by winning Division 1 but Aaron Barber continues to rule the roost. Michael Gordon won Division 2 to pull into 2nd place behind Rob Kaszuba. Division 3 started with AJ Hofmann cursing Angela Bradford and ended with Scott Murdock doing the same as she won the division to move into a tie for 2nd, while Scoot barely squeaked by into 1st. Finally, Bryan Mohr dominated Division 4 to extend his 2nd place position and start threatening division leader Jake Parrott.Bowlers jockeying to replace Ken in the The 200 Club this week include: Angela Bradford (222), Aubrey Moren (278), Brian Coe (235), Bryan Mohr (201), Carl Goetz (235,213,256), Cliff Barendsen (210), Ian Goetz (200,231), Kody Karnes (224), Michael Gordon (218,255), Russell Bingham (216,203), and Ryan Doll (235)See you next Tuesday!

THIS WEEK'S MVB Dennis Laube Runner Up: (See Posting)	#1 POWER BOWLER Michael Gordon Runner Up: Carl Goetz	#1 H2H BOWLER Jake Parrott Runner Up: Carl Goetz
FROM THE GUTTER (GUTTER QUOTE) "Fire when Gordon's in range!" General Kala, irritated that neither the gas chamber, swamp monsters, the destruction of Prince Vultan's kingdom, War Rocket Ajax, nor the Lightning Field seem to be able to stop Michael Gordon these days.

Pos.	Team name	Record	Percent	Total Pins	Change
1	Amazeballs	24.5-7.5	.766	16,571	n/a
2	Gimme Headpin	19-13	.594	19,395	+3
3	Sponsored By Rogue	19-13	.594	18,414	-1
4	Squirtin' Tunas	19-13	.594	16,594	n/a
5	10 Pins 10 Balls	17-15	.531	16,814	-2
6	The Pin is Mightier	12-20	.375	13,085	+1
7	Split It & Hit It	11-21	.344	12,124	-1
8	Ballz Out	3.5-28.5	.109	11,523	n/a

Men's High Series Scratch	Women's High Series Scratch
Carl Goetz - 704 Michael Gordon - 643 Aubrey Moren - 641 Brian Coe - 618 Kody Karnes - 611	Angela Bradford - 589 Freda Schroeder - 440 Alison Radke - 404
Men's High Series Handicap	Women's High Series Handicap
Carl Goetz - 704 Michael Gordon - 693 Russell Bingham - 678 Aubrey Moren - 662 Jake Parrott - 659	Angela Bradford - 665 Alison Radke - 562 Freda Schroeder - 531
Men's High Game Scratch	Women's High Game Scratch
Aubrey Moren - 278 Carl Goetz - 256 Michael Gordon - 255 Ryan Doll - 235 Brian Coe - 235 (t) Ian Goetz - 231	Angela Bradford - 222 Freda Schroeder - 172 Alison Radke - 147
Men's High Game Handicap	Women's High Game Handicap
Aubrey Moren - 285 Michael Gordon - 271 Carl Goetz - 256 Russell Bingham - 246 Bryan Mohr - 241	Angela Bradford - 247 Freda Schroeder - 202 Alison Radke - 199
Men's Pins Over Average	Women's Pins Over Average
Aubrey Moren - 87 Michael Gordon - 76 Russell Bingham - 54 Bryan Mohr - 51 Cliff Barendsen - 47	Angela Bradford - 54 Alison Radke - 13 Freda Schroeder - 10

The leadup to the position round saw none of our teams move in the standings. But that doesn't mean nothing happened...Lanes 41 & 42: Lacking their flu-riddled anchor, Amazeballs might have been in trouble. But Angela Bradford stepped up with an MVB-earning 534 series to sweep Split It & Hit It. Fresh off their victory last week, Dennis Blake hoped to comtinue their surge but his 475 series wasn't enough to mount a defense against AB. Amazeballs extends their lead by 1 game.Lanes 43 & 44: Reeling from a series of setbacks, The Pin Is Mightier were happy to secure a solitary win against Sponsored By Rogue, courtesy of Dan Imperial's team-leading 473 series. Carl Goetz found himself earning more Rogue sponsorships with his 656 series, gaining 3 wins but still losing ground in their attempt to regain first place.

Lanes 45 & 46: The matchup between Squirtin' Tuna and 10 Pins 10 Ballswas a battle of bests, as Michael Gordon and Aaron Barber best set new personal best series (633 and 658, respectively). In additional, Michael Gordon rolled a new personal high game (266) as did Phil Schroeder (246... or is that 24penis?). The combined antics of Gordon and Barber guaranteed 3 wins for the Tuna, but Phil's high game combined with Aubrey Moren's 619 series to at least win game 3.Lanes 47 & 48: Having blown through all their post-bowls early in the season, Ballz Out definitely picked the wrong night to forfeit as they would have enjoyed a 220-pin handicap against a truncated team that rolled largely under average. Gimme Headpin, down 2 bowlers, struggled to roll close enough to their averages but a late surge by Kody Karnes and Brian Coe won game 3 by enough to secure total pins as well.This week in Tournament of Champions, only Aaron Barber and Dan Imperial won their divisions outright. Barber's win puts him far head of the pack in division 1.Bowlers in The 200 Club this week include: Aaron Barber (213,243,202), Aubrey Moren (204,245), Brian Coe (214), Carl Goetz (232,225), Kody Karnes (204,226), Michael Gordon (266), Phil Schroeder (215,246), and Seth Gunderson (210)See you next Tuesday! Remember, it's the position round, so no new subs!

THIS WEEK'S MVB Angela Bradford Runner Up: (See Posting)	#1 POWER BOWLER Aaron Barber Runner Up: Michael Gordon	#1 H2H BOWLER Aaron Barber Runner Up: Michael Gordon
FROM THE GUTTER (GUTTER QUOTE) "I just don't have a bag big enough to hold two balls." Bryan Mohr, lamenting his petite sac

Pos.	Team name	Record	Percent	Total Pins	Change
1	Amazeballs	20.5-7.5	.732	14,359	n/a
2	Sponsored By Rogue	19-9	.679	16,068	n/a
3	10 Pins 10 Balls	16-12	.571	14,667	n/a
4	Squirtin' Tunas	16-12	.571	14,271	+1
5	Gimme Headpin	15-13	.536	17,036	-1
6	Split It & Hit It	11-17	.393	10,497	n/a
7	The Pin is Mightier	9-19	.321	11,375	n/a
8	Ballz Out	2.5-25.5	.089	9,837	n/a

Men's High Series Scratch	Women's High Series Scratch
Aaron Barber - 658 Carl Goetz - 656 Michael Gordon - 633 Aubrey Moren - 619 Kody Karnes - 610	Angela Bradford - 534 Freda Schroeder - 507
Men's High Series Handicap	Women's High Series Handicap
Michael Gordon - 695 Aaron Barber - 689 Carl Goetz - 656 Aubrey Moren - 647 Phil Schroeder - 635	Angela Bradford - 613 Freda Schroeder - 600
Men's High Game Scratch	Women's High Game Scratch
Michael Gordon - 266 Phil Schroeder - 246 Aubrey Moren - 245 Aaron Barber - 243 Carl Goetz - 232	Freda Schroeder - 197 Angela Bradford - 182
Men's High Game Handicap	Women's High Game Handicap
Michael Gordon - 286 Phil Schroeder - 262 Aubrey Moren - 254 Aaron Barber - 253 Carl Goetz - 232	Freda Schroeder - 228 Angela Bradford - 208
Men's Pins Over Average	Women's Pins Over Average
Michael Gordon - 92 Phil Schroeder - 66 Aubrey Moren - 57 Aaron Barber - 56 Dennis Cummings - 32 Russell Bingham - 32 (t) Dennis Laube - 32 (t)	Freda Schroeder - 36 Angela Bradford - 15